Kim O’Brien: Goodbye, Chicago and HELLO DISNEYWORLD

Sex and the City of Chicago

By Kimberley O’Brien

I get on the plane for DISNEYWORLD TOMORROW YOU BITCHES! LOL! I AM SO EXCITED AND KEVIN AND HIS GILDFRIEND ARE GOING TO PICK ME UP IN THE MORNING AND WE’LL SHARE A CAB TO O’HARE AND THEN IT’S COSMOS AND FRUITY DRINKS WITH UMBRELLAS IN THEM FOR FOUR WHOLE DAYS YOU GUYS! I’m going to miss my MADISON though! I’m so emotionally torn apart by this and stuff because I don’t want to leave my doggie but I do want to go to DISNEYWORLD WITH KEVIN AND HIS GIRLFRIEND TOO! OMG THIS IS ALL SO MUCH! LOL! THERE IS TOO MUCH GOING THROUGH MY POOR HEAD ALL AT THE SAME TIME YOU GUYS! LOL! I’M AFRAID THAT MY POOR BRAIN IS GOING TO GO POP! LOL!

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this is Kim O’Brien’s brain on Disneyworld!! LOL!! it’s gonna explode!!!

THE definitive Sex and the City movie and it IS SEX AND THE CITY CHICAGO! GRRRRR!

Sex in Chicago

By Kim O’Brien

I am getting SUPER SUPER EXCITED about this Florida trip even though it takes me out of my AMAZING Chicago home. Did I tell you that I’m taking all of my SJPs? O, I AM TOTALLY TAKING ALL OF MY SJP’s! LOL! Or, all of the ones that I don’t have on display in my condo that is, but that’s still each style that they even make so technically it IS all of the SJPs! LOL! If I could have one wish, it would be for Sarah Jessica Parker to go shoe shopping with me! LOL! That would be SO FUN! And then while we’re tring on shoes that cost more than some people’s CARS I could totally tell her about our Sex and the City CHICAGO! Script and then I bet that she would read it and OF COURSE she would love it because that’s all that it would take for Sarah Jessica Parker to really love our script would be is if she actually got a chance to read it because it is so good that it speaks for itself and stuff! Oh Sarah Jessica Parker! I wish that you had friendlier assistants or whatever it is that you have because they are keeping you from making THE definitive Sex and the City movie and it IS SEX AND THE CITY CHICAGO! GRRRRR! Stupid secretaries that don’t show people REALLY GOOD MOVIE scripts when they get them in the mail and in the email and on the fax machines and in the mail and all of that and instead just probably throw them away when they get them instead of showing them to Sarah Jessica Parker make me almost as mad as the stupid lawyers at my stupid firm that think they’re SO MUCH BETTER THAN EVERYBODY ELSE BT THEY’RE REALLY JUST SLAVES AND THEY DON’T EVEN KNOW IT! GRRR!!! I NEED A COSMO!

Kevin’s cat + Madison = ?????

Sex in Chicago
By Kimberley O’Brien
I’ve been watching Animal Planet lately and I think that cats are SUPER CUTE but I don’t think that Madison would get along with a cat but I think that I still might want one anyway and then I could you know, teach Madison how to get along with it and stuff? Kevin has a cat and he said that he’d bring her over later to see how Madison reacts to her but I already know that Madison is going to go APE DOODY! Because she is a HUNTER DOG! LOL! She is SO FIERCE and PROTECTIVE AND STUFF that OF COURSE SHE’S Going to want to go after that cat because she’s going to think that Mommy is in danger from that cat and stuff and I don’t want Kevin’s cat to get hurt so I’m thinking about calling the whole thing off. Kevin will think I’m crazy, I know it. He thinks that Madison is just a big dough ball or something. He calls her Mommy’s Little Butter Face and I’m not sure if that’s an insult or what but Madison doesn’t know either so I don’t know if it really matters or not if it is. You know what I mean? Let Kevin Anderson have his stupid fun calling my doggie names. He doesn’t get the privilege of living with the best, most beautiful doggy in the whole world and rat’s my Madison! LOL!

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Maybe Madison will get along with a cat. This picture is ADORABLE!

Kimberley O’Brien: Chicago has the BEST cheeseburgers

Sex in Chicago

By Kimberley O’Brien

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OHMYGOD YOU GUYS these are SO Good! Kim O’Brien is a SLAVE to cheeseburgers!!!!

I LOVE cheeseburgers! And Chicago has the BEST cheeseburgers in the whole country you guys and that’s the TRUTH! There’s a place called Gabe’s right down he street and they make these cheeseburgers that I am a TOTAL slave for but they’re not that big or anything but they’re SO GOOD IT’S CRAZY YOU GUYS! They do cheeseburgers the traditional Chicago way where it’s just meat and bread and cheese and pickles and mustard like a brat or whatever. THEYRE SO GOOD THOUGH YOU WON’T EVEN BELIEVE IT! I suspect that their hamburger is really bacon meat or something. I’ve had it where people do that and they do that all of the time like where they grind up bacon in their hamburger and then you have a bacon hamburger? IT IS SCRUMPTIOUS!!! Another place that makes an AMAZING bacon burger jut like that is this brewery type place downtown here that I don’t quite remember the name of… ERRRRR!!! IT SUCKS GETTING OLD YOU GUYS CAUSE I CAN’T REMEMBER STUFF AS WELL AS I USED TO BE ABLE TO AND THAT SUCKS SO BAD! I should start writing everything that I know now, and then I can go back and reference it when I forget what it was and stuff. Getting old is a total trial on my PATIENCE you guys. I bet Madison remembers the name of that place. They made her a doggy cheeseburger and she ATE IT ALL UP SUPER DUPER FAST! My Madison is a VERY fast eater when it comes to cheeseburgers. LIKE MOMMY LIKE DOGGY! LOL!

 

stupid lawyer SLAVES!

Sex in Chicago

By Kim O’Brien

I had to go to trial today but luckily I was only administrating and stuff. Sometimes I like to be he center of attention (SHUT UP YOU BITCHES! LOL!)  but today I just didn’t feel like it, you know? It’s just that sometimes I just want to be left alone but sometimes people won’t let me be left alone cause they just got to talk and talk like stupid lawyer SLAVES! But that wasn’t the case today because nobody bothered me or anything and everything went exactly like I’d hoped it would and we were in and out of there before anybody could say Chicago judges smell funny, lol!

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Kim O’Brien: Slave to Chicago judges!

 

CHICAGO! YOU’RE MY CITY AND YOU KNOW IT

Sex in Chicago

By Kimberley O’Brien

Epcot Center is going to be AMAZING! I AM A TOTAL SLAVE FOR STUPID DISNEY STUFF! YOU KNOW IT! I’m almost as much of a total slave for Disney stuff now as I am a total salve for all things CHICAGO! YOU’RE MY CITY AND YOU KNOW IT BITCHES! LOL! I’ve got SO many things picked out that I’m going to wear now! I’ve got two bags packed. One with shorts and t shirts and comfy shoes and stuff like that for the daytime walking around and seeing the sights that there are to be seen, and one bag just for NIGHT LIFE OUTFITS! YOU KNOW IT GIRLS! If Kim O’Brien is going out, KIM O’BRIEN IS DRESSING LIKE SHE IS STILL BACK IN CHICAGO WITH ALL OF HER BITCHES! LOL! Really, I’m going to miss all of you bitches while I’m gone, but not nearly as much as I am going to miss my beautiful doggie Madison I LOVE YOU MADISON! But really though don’t cry you bunch of whiny babies because the QUEEN of CHICAGO will be back before you even KNOW IT! LOL! Actually, I guess it will be like, four days later and stuff and that’s really not a very long time to be gone anyway and I’m SURE that nobody will even notice I’m gone or anything, right? WRONG! LOL! CHICAGO CAN’T EVEN BEGIN TO LIVE WITHOUT KIM O’BRIEN! EVEN FOR LIKE FOUR DAYS! LOL!

THIS IS SUCH A TRIAL!!!

SEX in CHICAGO

By Kimberley O’Brien

OH MY GOD KEVN’S BOSS WON’T JUST MAKE UP HIS MIND OR SOMETHING! I told Kevin today that he should just stop being that ZERO’s SLAVE and start being this HERO’s travel buddy or something, but Kevin didn’t understand what in the hell I was trying to say. To tell you the truth, I wasn’t sure what I was trying to say either. Mommy had her BUZZ on! LOL! But seriously you guys! Kevn’s boss is totally OK with him taking the time off from work now and it is SO CONFUSING! That little man is just like one of those middle lawyers at the office that doesn’t even know what they’re doing but they keep messing things up for everybody else because they still think that they need to make decisions or whatever and it is SO STUPID for them to be doing that becase they don’t even know what they’re doing AND THEY KNOW IT! SHOULD I EVEN BUY MY PLANE TICKETS NOW OR SHOULD I HAVE TO WAIT FOR KEVN’S STUPID BOSS TO CHANGE HIS STUPID MIND AGAIN THISIS SUCH A TRIAL!!!

Frustrated Businesswoman on the Phone

Ugh. Kimberley O’Brien is expressing her feelings through clip art! Everything is SUCH A TRIAL! GRRRR! I feel just like “frustrated businesswoman on the phone!”

I’m putting KEVIN’S COOKING ON TRIAL!!!!!

Sex in Chicago

By Kimberley O’Brien

So the trip may be delayed a bit I guess. Kevin’s boss wasn’t really willing to give him the time off or something and that is a REAL BUMMER YOU GUYS! I guess that when you’re the best bartender in all of CHICAGO and you make the best CHILI CHEESE FRIES IN THE WHOLE WORLD then you have to make some sacrifices for the good of your people. In other news, Madison got into the trash again today and she is SO GROSS!!! OH MY GOD NOW I WANT CHILI FRIES RIGHT NOW! MADISON BABY GO GET MOMMY CHILI FRIES FROM UNCLE KEVIN YOU DIRTY DOGGY YOU! LOL! HURRY MADISON! MOMMY NEEDS TO PUT KEVIN’S COOKING ON TRIAL IMMEDIATELY! LOL! Stupid Kevin. I was getting really excited about the Epcot place!

EPCOT DOES HAVE ALCOHOL! LOL!

Sex in Chicago

By Kimberley O’Brien

BOO! THE MAGIC KINGDOM DOESN’T HAVE ALCOHOL IN IT! WHAT KIND OF STUPID DECISION IS THAT BY THOSE STUPID PEOPLE! But there is good news, EPCOT DOES HAVE ALCOHOL! LOL! If you need me, I will be by the big ugly globe thing with my cosmo, RIGHT GIRLS! YEAAAAAAAH! LOL! I am SUCH a slave to fashionable beverages! LOL!

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Yay, Epcot! Look out, here comes Kim O’Brien from CHICAGO!!!

I AM A SLAVE FOR COCKTAIL CHERRIES!

Sex in Chicago

by Kimberley O’Brien

What am I going to do in Disneyworld first? I heard from one of the little junior lawyers in the office that they have lots of booze at Disneyworld now. If that’s true, I am going to be in HEAVEN! HEAVEN WITH COSMOS AND ALL THE COCKTAIL CHERRIES THAT I CAN EAT! LOL! I AM A SLAVE FOR COCKTAIL CHERRIES!

Close up of a cherry on a white surface

Kimberley O’Brien: SLAVE TO COCKTAIL CHERRIES